The Sparkle

My kids have found a new game that they love, you may know it, it’s called “would you rather”. One person makes up a seemingly impossible choice and the other MUST pick one, both or neither are not options.

Motherhood often feels like a giant, life sized version of this game to me. “Would you rather clean the house OR take a shower” “Would you rather have 5min alone OR make dinner for your kids who won’t eat if you don’t” “Would you rather take a pottery class and feel guilt about it OR be with your kids and feel bad about it” and on and on and on it goes.

But to roughly quote one of my favorite spiritual authors of all time, Julia Cameron, “Have you ever tried to count the different shades of pink flowers in a meadow?” The inability to do so points perfectly and squarely to a universe of AND not OR. That is the universe I believe in, that is the experience of life that I hope to cultivate for myself, my family and the communities I serve.

What does this have to do with your sparkle and the joy you experience in it? Well my guess is, somewhere along the line, you started to play that adult version of “would you rather” and started playing life as if it were an OR not and AND game. (Have you ever met a child who wants rainbow OR chocolate sprinkles?! Given the chance- BOTH is always the answer)

Yes mothering requires that we make choices and sacrifices but I am here to challenge that they need to all be at the expense of your connection to joy. There is a balance that preserves our sense of zest for the lives we are living, preserves our sparkle.

So here is my challenge to you….

Believe in an AND Universe again.

This week in your journal and during your solo cup moments ask yourself what your sweet little spirit is asking for. What she’s asking for is the key to where you will find your sparkle! Listen to her! Find a way (no matter how tiny, tiny steps are often the best steps because they last and lead to more change) to choose AND. “My family gets dinner AND I involve everyone in clean up so I have 5min to myself.” “I do a job that I love AND my children are loved”

What are your ORs and how do we change them into ANDs so you can sparkle too?!